Don't know how I am still operating normally.
Jess and Ava are wearing me down like I'm a tissue that's been blown into once too often. Woke up this morning at 330am to screaming from both the little ones and Ang yelling and cursing at them both. I got up and steadied the ship. Managed to get Ava back to sleep after 40 minutes and Jess fell asleep watching TV (coughing). They are so demanding - need every last scrap of my persona.
My Mum came down on Sunday. Jess summed it all up nicely "I don't like this Nanna". Couldn't agree more with that simple statement. Token visits are just that. I'd rather she visibly didn't give two rats about us. She couldn't wait to get back to her little boy and little girl (brothers kids). My parents never (and still don't) supported me with the whole Kylie-Byron mind fuck. That is still bitter within me. Been over 10 years and I'd like nothing more than to smack my fist in their heads for their lack of support. It now continues with Jess and Ava. Well - at least they are consistent. If only my kids names started with X or G....
I liken the last 3 months (especially) to being in a warzone. Sleep is near non-existent. Stress levels through the roof. Shell shock, PTSD - yeah I'll have a bit of each.
Was Byron's birthday last Friday (turned 11). I called him up and spoke to him for 10 minutes. He seems to have calmed down a little but I can't gauge this until I see him face to face. Talked to Kylie who was pretty drunk and she told me he has calmed down over the last month. Baby steps. Day by day type of thing.
Work is just that - work. If I didn't have to do it I wouldn't. Alas, I don't see any winning tattslotto tickets in my neck of the woods. Or a 200K quaddie. Boo hoo...